A 30-year-old Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu coach has been terminated from his position after sending inappropriate messages to a 17-year-old student, according to reports from the gym where the incident occurred.
The situation came to light when the teenage student reported receiving disturbing text messages from her instructor, who is married with a pregnant wife. The coach allegedly expressed romantic interest in the minor despite their significant age gap and his position of authority at the gym.
“He has completely broken my trust,” the teen wrote in her initial post seeking advice. “He KNOWS how old I am and how much I hate getting approached inappropriately at the gym. He has even warned me about how some males misunderstand kindness as flirting… and now he’s turned into one of them.”
Following her report to gym management, the coach was promptly fired and banned from the premises. However, the situation escalated when he continued to contact the teenager, sending multiple messages attempting to justify his behavior and place blame elsewhere.
“I’m about to lose EVERYTHING over a stupid text. I told you it was stupid and I didn’t mean it,” read one of his messages. In other texts, he claimed he was “not himself” and referenced medication, stating, “I wasn’t ok and I wasn’t me.”
The coach’s inappropriate behavior allegedly extended beyond text messages. According to the teenager, he had previously made uncomfortable comments about her appearance, including “calling my legs thick” and rating her appearance, as well as touching her inappropriately during training sessions. She also reported that he had attempted to convince her that men could never be nice to women they weren’t attracted to.
Child safety advocates and BJJ professionals have condemned the coach’s actions, emphasizing that coaches sending personal texts to underage students, especially romantic in nature, crosses professional boundaries and constitutes inappropriate conduct. Many gym owners consider such behavior grounds for immediate termination.
The teenager initially expressed feeling guilty about reporting the coach, writing, “It kinda makes me feel like I’m a horrible person and I literally destroyed someone’s life.” However, the BJJ community has rallied around her, reassuring her that she did the right thing.
“You didn’t ruin his life. He made choices to behave inappropriately. His choices have consequences. He’s an adult,” wrote one supporter. “You acted bravely by speaking up, and your actions protected future students from dealing with predatory behavior.”
Experts advise that young athletes in similar situations should immediately inform trusted adults, document all inappropriate communications, and discontinue private contact with the instructor. They also recommend that parents maintain open communication with their children about appropriate coach-student boundaries.
