An incident at Saturday’s Adidas Nationals wrestling tournament has reignited concerns about toxic parenting culture in youth sports after a father refused to shake the hand of his son’s opponent and then forecefully shoved his own child to the floor following a narrow defeat.
Tommy Perez, father of wrestler Kingston Perez and a former Mocco Wrestling coach, was caught on camera displaying toxic behavior after his son lost a close 4-3 match to Liam Reeves at the prestigious national tournament.
Video footage from the event shows Tommy Perez first refusing to shake hands with the young wrestler who had just defeated his son. Moments later, in a display of frustration, he forcefully shoved Kingston Perez, causing the young athlete to fall to the floor.
This is particularly jarring given Kingston Perez‘s otherwise dominant performance at the tournament. The young wrestler won his four combined bouts in the Round of 32, Round of 16, quarterfinals and semifinals with a combined score of 48-0, including two 15-0 technical superiority victories. Despite this impressive run, the single loss appeared to trigger his father’s reaction.
The video quickly spread across social media, drawing widespread condemnation from the wrestling community. FloSports content director Christian Pyles called the behavior:
“beyond disturbing,”
and added:
“Hopefully, SafeSport and leadership is involved and takes quick action.”
Many observers pointed to the incident as a clear example of what they describe as wrestling’s toxic culture problem, an unfortunate reality that coaches, organizations and advocates have been working to eliminate from the sport.
This incident is far from isolated in wrestling. The sport has faced mounting scrutiny over its treatment of young athletes and the intense pressure placed on competitors.
In 2022, multiple wrestlers quit the Wabash College team, citing ignored mental health concerns and coaches who allegedly labeled injured athletes as:
“lazy.”
More recently, in 2024, Iowa wrestler Gabe Arnold was hospitalized for mental health concerns, further highlighting the mental toll the sport’s culture can take.
Even professional wrestlers have opened up about damaging experiences. WWE superstar Brock Lesnar recently revealed his mother would leave him at wrestling tournaments to find his own way home if he lost.
While wrestling develops discipline, toughness and work ethic in countless young athletes, incidents like Saturday’s serve as reminders that the line between pushing for excellence and abusive behavior can be dangerously thin.
Youth sports psychologists consistently warn that parental overinvestment in children’s athletic performance can cause lasting psychological harm. When parents tie their own self worth to their children’s wins and losses, the results can be emotionally and sometimes physically damaging.
